[the operation, not the game]
mike has to get an operation. he’s never had an operation before, so he’s scared. no worries mike, you just simply go to sleep, you wake up and everybody is nice to you. so this entry is dedicated to my past 3 surgeries. WHAT MR GLASSIC HAD SURGERIES? yes. i did. FREAK surgeries.
CHILDHOOD – THANKSGIVING EVE – springfield, VA, 2nd grade.
tommy comes over, and my parents are chillin. tommy and i are chillin. we have a race to turn on the tv, first one to touch the tv winsl. BOOM. we run straight into the tv. thats not where my little accident happened. as we ran into the tv, we looked up, the whole entertainment thing is shaking. that is not where the accident happened. it shakes and a huge box of toothpicks is comin down. nope, thats not where the accident occurred either. our parents yell at us, and we pick up all the toothpicks. that is, all but one.
THANKSGIVING DAY – im running around the house cause i have ADD or something. and uh oh. there is a sharp, indescribable pain in my foot. my dad notices i stopped running.
dad: ….whats wrong with you?
me: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH
the tooth pick went straight up my foot. and i go apeshit. my dads tryin to calm me down to take it out, but this son of a bitch is in there, deep. my dad takes me to the hospital, and they put me on a table. i will forever remember this moment for the rest of my life.
doctor: its in there deep. ima cut open your foot a little bit.
me: what?
doctor: its going to be quick and ill get it out.
me: WHAAAAAAAAT?!
and without putting me to sleep, this motherfucker cuts me open. and i go through another hysterical bitchfit. like probably the most bitchfits i went through in one day. and i didn’t even get to eat any thanksgiving food. what a waste. but did he get it out? NO. THIS MOTHERFUCKER DID NOT. instead, he broke it in TWO. and only got 1/4th of it out. my dad is angry, and my body can’t produce anymore tears. just salt coming out of my eyes. they put a cast on me, and of course my parents being korean, buy me only one crutch and make me go to school on monday. i looked like fuckin tiny tim. which leads to my second operation. a week or two, my time has arrived. i was scared as fuck. they put me into an operating room, and this is a different doctor.
doctor: who’s your favorite super hero?
me: HE-MAN OH BOY I LOVE HE MAN
doctor: HE-MAN! he’s so strong! you can be strong like him right?
me: YES I CAN
doctor: does this hurt?
i feel a little prick in my foot.
me: just a little.
doctor: GOOOOOOOOOOD boy.
one tear comes out, and at this point i thought i was done. relieved as a bitch. three nurses come to the table. i thought “weird.”
doctor: so what does he-man do?
me: well first of all he’s also a prince and then he-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH WHAT THE FUCK
the doctor cuts me open again, the nurses hold me down, and they get the toothpick out. worst, operation ever. those were my first two operations i’ve ever got. im pretty sure my dad still has the toothpick they got out in a jar.
the third one was around 4th or 5th grade. my parents saw me cough up blood, turns out i gotta get my tonsils removed. that was simple cause i just went to sleep and woke up but i couldn’t eat anything. couldn’t talk or eat solid food for a while, but nothing crazy.
and thats the story of my three operations.
k i love you bye
[run larry run]
june 24, 1994 – forrest gump is released in theaters nationwide
Academy Awards, 1995 – Forrest gump wins best picture, Tom Hanks wins best actor
june 25, 1994- may 21, 2011 -”seats taken” “run forrest run” “bubba gump shrimp” “jennnaaay” “mama said life is like a box of chocolates” larry never understands any of these jokes, but still participates in group laughter. usually with a big question mark over his head.
april 5, 2010 – wally buys larry a forrest gump dvd.
april 2, 2011 – wally says “i’ll only go to k street if you watch forrest gump”
may 20, 2011 – jrok, one of larry closest friends, comes over to the factory for the first time since larry moved there 3 years ago.
may 21, 2011 – larry watches forrest gump, for the first time ever. along with jrok hutch and wally.
i dont know why, but i just didn’t watch it. since it was such a iconic movie from my generation, i felt like i should make the moment special and i did. i actually planned to watch it on my 50th birthday, but i really wanted wally to come out with us, and i was scared that i might be blind by then. but now, i can finally participate in the jokes that you all do. and yes, i loved it. what a great, great movie. johnhur cried like a girl. AHAHAHAHAHA AGAIN
i was looking through some old calvin and hobbes comic strips online (THE BEST COMIC STRIP EVER), and i forgot what the last strip was about. so i looked it up and came across this. this is NOT a real strip. someone who just made it themselves.
probably, the most depressing thing i’ve ever seen. its a fake, but still. if the strip ended like that, i wouldve jumped out the window.
here is the real ending
what a relief, thats a lot better aint it?
oh joan don think i forgot.
Joan: he brought it backk
the auther
omg
aauther
lol
me: …
AUTHOR.
k i love you bye
[the girl bracket]
last week on our way to nyc, bobert and i discussed about the girls we knew, and who would be best suited for who.
bobby: man we need a chart or something
me: or a bracket. HIMYM style.
low and behold, we walked into roy’s room and found a big ass white board. shit got pretty serious after that. so we created, GIRL BRACKETOLOGY 2011, determining which girl is best suited for who.
i was the first one to participate. we listed all the girls i knew, and they made me pick the top 32 based on personality, looks, intelligence, hobbies, communication, etc. the panel of judges (the guys) then seeded them to the best of their knowledge, as in #1, #2…basically like a march madness bracket. but the only catch was, i had no idea what the seeding looked like, and who was where in the bracket. this basically turned into more of a dating show.
so the first round they asked questions like “would you prefer a cute rural girl or a pretty girl all around urban girl?” giving a little bit more advantage to the higher seed. the questions provided more information about the girls as the rounds progressed like “girl a is cute, goes to church often, drinks like a champ. girl b is pretty, has a good career, dances really well, and drinks like a champ.” we later realized that every girl on my bracket pretty much drank like champs. the judges did a good job on describing the girls without giving away who they were.
don’t worry ladies, no insulting qualities were mentioned. only characteristics that were important to me.
went to the sweet 16, to the elite 8, final four, and the national championship game. there were some upsets, but no cinderella stories.
tommy: so whos it going to be? A? or B?
everybody was on the edge of their seats.
me:….i pick B.
panel of judges: OOh wow.
me:…WHO WHO WHO WHO WHO WHO ?
ROBIN
on saturday i made her come out, and she only agreed to come out if i would ride back with her from ballroom. lets just say that didn’t happen cause i got drunk, left and forgot to even tell her. LOL. ima jackass.
youre curious where you were on the bracket arent you? and who you lost to? and who you beat out?
k i love you bye
[ouch]
last week, my friends and i made a mid-week nyc trip to see my boy jimmy graduate from columbia university. so we were on the streets, enjoying the nice day. i saw a “baked by melissa” cupcake shop. i tried their mini-cupcakes a few years ago and i thought why the hell not? so i bought a dozen. this is what they looked like.
a girl in line tapped my shoulder.
girl: excuse me, can i see how big it is?
me: yeah sure. but its kinda small.
girl: oh really?
me: yeah.
i opened the box.
girl: oh my. it IS small.
me (thinking): so many jokes come to mind right now.
girl (to friends): hey guys he showed me and it IS small
me (thinking): i should tell everybody around us that shes talking about cupcakes.
on that beautiful saturday, steve wally and i went longboarding. wally said steve and i should race. wally took off his shirt, so he could be the “sexy-waving-flag” girl like they have on street races. we didn’t tell him to, he just did it (i have weird friends) and…we’re off!
steve: uh oh, im on the board backwards
2 seconds later
steve: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH
wally: OOOOOOOH SHIT
i turned around jumped off my board, and steve is tumbling. TUMBLIN HARDCORE on the pavement. i jumped off my board. about to run towards steve. but i hesitated. turned around and thought about picking up my board first. i had a series of thoughts.
“man my board is still rollin, and its brand new. “
“but on the other hand, steve needs my help.”
“but shit that is a brand new board that i just got and its headed towards the garbage area. “
“but on the other hand steve is one of my best friends.”
“but what if my board goes into sticky gooey gunk and stuff?”
“im spending an awful amount of time deciding what to do, when i could’ve have done both by now”
sorry steve.
i ran towards my board, picked it up, and ran back to steve.
steve: FUCK IT HURTS MAN IT HURTS. i can’t move.
wally: wanna…piggy…back ride?
me: do you need cpr or somethin
steve shows us the damage.
me: OUCH…wow that looks pretty cool. picture time! smile!
steve: wtf…fine.
wally: yeah looks bad ass
me: i want one.
steve: fuck man, no you dont. i can’t move.
me: yeah i want the scar, but i dont want the pain.
wally: we can go coloring
happy birthday julia!
k i love you bye
[random 20 second post]
a few more may brithdays and brithday hell month is over, once again. mel made an event on fb for her birthday. i looked at it, and then looked at it closely. uh did mel make a mistake? then bobby creeped up and looked at it. click to make it bigger. thats what she said.
TEHEH
I got over my hangover yesterday and now im goin to nyc, to recreate another hangover experience. time to party up with jiae grace roy hot sarah tommy bobby and all the other nyc folks. hopefully not too hard, but we know how shit gets with jiae. makes everybody go H.A.M, and if you dont, she will K I L L you. not tryin to get mangekyo sharinganed by her too.
most girls, when they get mad, they give you the stank eye.
when julia and jiae get mad, they give you the mangekyo sharingan eye.
brought to you a la uchicha.
blog hiatus for the rest of the week. need new material. which means i need wally to do something funny this weekend.
k i love you bye
[weekend report]
thats what 2011 is turning into.
i drank hardcore three days straight, and i felt like death on sunday.
saturday i woke up with a feeling of shame and regret, why? cause i had no memory of friday. i was planning to run errands, watch a matinee movie, and basically fill in the gaps of my life. instead, i ended up being drunk til noon, watched hbo and cinemax for about 8 hours. i thought to myself, at least ill be sober tonight, and have a great sunday again. but then…
sunday i woke up with a feeling of stupidity. like i actually felt like i lost about half of what was left of my intelligence. the only way i would feel any worse was if i slept on my glasses and they got crooked.
we got issues.
saturday night was dahari’s birthday extravaganza. we went to the park, the club. we thought “its pouring out, not that many people would be out.” wrong, wrong indeed. the thing about park is that when its packed, you just get pushed around. like one time i found a spot, stood there, 10 minutes later im at the other side of the club, and near the stairwell. then the bouncer says “you can’t stand there bro. gotta keep movin” so then you go down the stairs for no reason, walk to back to the other stairwell, walk back up, and then you find that spot again. repeat that 10 times and you got your park experience.
drake was there, on the same floor. i saw him standing, talking to some dudes with a billion hot girls around. i wonder if he ever gets to just dance with a girl. i bet you he wishes he could dance with a girl. but i also bet that he doesn’t care cause he has a lot of the sex with a lot of hot girls so theres an equal trade off. i like drake’s music. can’t hate on that. i like watching his interviews cause he doesn’t get all ghetto-fab on everybody. i was walking through the crowd, and i walked by his table. and as i walked by, i heard this.
guy: why are we walking here again
girl: i want to see how tall he is
LOL yeah right. you just want to suck his thingy. groupie alert. the worst groupie is the one that doesn’t admit it.
walked over to k street to say some birthday hellos. i’m on a real bad streak of getting bartenders attentions at k street. theres one bartender that i will never ever go to ever again. like she has to be the WORST. white, short blonde hair. she seems nice, but one thing she should not be is a bartender. last week she gently gave me the “hold on a sec” finger, turned around, and didn’t turn back around for another 20 minutes. i went to the other side of the bar, to another bartender and got a drink within 3 minutes. good thing i wasn’t getting a drink for a girl i was hitting on. cause that would be jjogeum embarassing.
but still all in all it was a good weekend.
k i love you bye
[hangover part three]
i walked into my office this morning. everybody was tellin me i looked hungover as shit. that is because i AM hungover as shit. probably the most hungover ive been in the past year. at least its raining, so everybody shares my misery. but why? and how? how did it end up like this? quadruple up the coffee, break out the vitamin water-revive, and time to find opportunities to sleep at work.
i did some longboarding, went to the jim, got home, showered, sat in bed and i was about to open up a book. a BOOK. not even a comic. i looked at my phone and it said 900. i thought to myself “jason, this aint right.” so i called julia.
me: wanna do somethin?
julia: what do yo uwanna do?
me: i guess drink? what else is there to do?
julia: do you want to drink?
me: do you?
julia: i dont care
me: meet me at shikgaek at 10.
this morning…first thing julia says.
Julia: omg.
me: EXACTLY.
julia: 
so last night we started with just drinks and casual julia-flirting-with-me conversations but the next thing you know, people started flowing in. robins birthday (happy bday once again handsome) entourage, people here and there. after that, we’re pounding beers, im losing to girls at chugging, and now im passed out at the nrb. its 3 am, i pee on my parents lawn, stumble in the house, crash into bed. then i realized i have all my shit in my car. so went back out, only to realize that i parked in the middle of the driveway, blocking both my parents cars. ummm yeah better move that ish.
harmonica said she would wake me up at 830 for work. worst alarm clock ever. i woke up at 8:45, to my grumma watching obnoxiously loud korean news.
ran to my car, sped my ass to work.
late again.
by the way, another girl fell off the longboard last night. that makes it THREE. whos next?
umm yeah im pretty sure i smell like shame and regret.
k i love you bye
[longboarding thor]
convos of the day
Tommy: i had the weirdest dream last night
it was about marshall and his dad (How I met your mother characters)
me: LOLOLOL
wtf
Tommy: i was in a 18 wheeler truck with them
and marshalls dad had to change a tire or something
he went out to check it and he died from a passing car hitting him or something
and i think i started crying
me: i think its time you stop watching how i met your mother
another convo.
Joan: you might as well
mine? or mind
me: LOL
neither
you might as well
Joan: HAAHAHAHA
i bought this baby last night. i asked 3 people, just yes or no. all three said go for it. so i did.
$350 on this bitch. i think ima name it “ethel” or “lucy.”
someone said i better “ride it to death.”
someone wants me to die longboarding?
which reminds me, yesterday, im longboarding down a road behind my apartment complex. i go on roads not sidewalks cause its smoother. and i can hear cars coming so i usually just get off the road . goin down some hills, and skating back up. taking my time, enjoying the nice day. sweaty like a ho in church. all of a sudden…HONNNNKK. i freaked the fuck out and skated into gravel and almost fell. turned around…it was a car. a ninja car. what the fuck. how come i didn’t hear it behind me? as it passed by, i saw why. “hybrid.” you win this time hybrid.
watched thor the whore last night. without giving anything away, here is my review.
-when thor took off his shirt, its like looking at a mirror image of myself. haha just kidding my hair isn’t long enough.
-i wish nathalie portman looked at me like the way she looked thor. or any girl for that matter.
-was it weird to see charles minor, the guy that michael scott spent all night making C bagels for, as the gate keeper guy?
-rene russo? last movie i saw her in was ransom, in like 1999.
i give it
a good 7/10 glasses. entertaining.
anybody else watch it? thats also a nerd? i need someone to talk about it with. ON MY LEVEL.
k i love you bye
[church high school girls at clubs]
there is a youth group girl at our church, named erin. i think shes a sophomore? in high school. shes one of my friend’s little sister. funny girl. why am i talking about this girl?
saturday, we went to k street as many of you may know for hutch’s birthday. now i only had a few drinks, and it was much earlier on in the night. so a few hours later, i was completely sober. steve, had a few more drinks than i did, might have been a little drunk, but not like wasted. so there were a group of cute girls dancing, and i started dancing with one of em. steve sees the girls, and comes up to me. as he walks up, one of the girls taps him. steve turns, looks at her, and his mouth drops. wide open. like i’ve never seen his jaw drop so wide open. like i can shove my foot in his mouth. now i couldn’t hear what he was saying…or asking…but i was curious to who this girl was.
steve: WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
girl says something. and steves eyes are huge.
steve: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
after a brief, two minute conversation, steve comes up to me. i’m mad curious to see who that girl was.
me: dude how do you know her
steve: HOLY SHIT DO YOU KNOW WHO THAT IS?!!?
me: who?!
steve: ERIN
me: erin?…..from the office?
steve: ERIN. THE ONE FROM CHURCH. TEDDY GRAHAMS LITTLE SISTER!!
me: ????
i looked at the girl. that was not her. like maybe similar hair style? but thats even a stretch. steve is ultimately confused. i looked at steve. steve didn’t seem too drunk. looked at the girl again. i was 100% sure that wasn’t her.
me: dude, ru drunk? thats not erin.
steve: YES IT IS
me: dude i know what she looks like i see her almost every sunday at church. THAT. IS NOT. HER.
steve: oh. u sure?
me: positive.
steve: oh…shit.
steve: then whyd she tap my shoulder?
me: maybe she wanted to meet you?
steve: damn it.
now the funny part is, steve talked to that girl like she was in high school. LOLOLOL. i wonder what the fuck he said to her, and i wondered how fuckin confused that girl mustve been.
but this is not the first time this has happened to us. a few years ago, we went to 1223, remember those days? there was also another high school girl, evelyn in our church that also strongly resembled our other friend. so this was well into the night, and we were drunk. pretty drunk. wally goes to the bathroom. 20 seconds later, he runs up to me.
wally: OMG LARRY
me: what
wally: DO YOU KNOW WHO I JUST SAW
me: who????
wally: EVELYN
me: evelyn?
wally: EVELYN FROM CHURCH!!!
wally looked serious, and he wasn’t fuckin around.
me: shut the fuck up man
wally: I SWEAR TO GAHD I SAW HER
me: how could she even get in?
wally: I DONT KNOW. A FAKE OR SOMETHING. BUT TRUST ME. I SAW HER.
me: holy shit are you serious? where?
wally pointed at the group of girls. the weird part was, i knew the girls. so i approached them to see if evelyn was in fact really there. i saw my friend so young.
so young: hi larry!
me: hi so young—-waiit a fuckin minute.
then i remembered something hanna said about evelyn a few months ago. “omg that girl looks like so young!”
i go back to wally.
wally: SEE?!
me: dude thats so young.
wally: who?
me: SO YOUNG. hanna’s roomate.
wally: oh. whoops.
my friends need glasses.
k i love you bye
[a mudder day]
happy belated to all you probably-non mothers, but future mothers.
for mothers day, i got my mom absolutely nothing. no card, no flowers. (well, cards in the mail, waiting for my sister to send hers). instead of taking my mom to a restaurant, my mom and grumma cooked me and my pop dinner at home. instead of getting my mom a cake, my mum cut up watermelon slices, and only gave me the top parts of the triangle. (as a child..err still till this day, i only eat the top half of the watermelon triangle slices and give my mom the rest). don’t think im an asshole yet, cause i did suggest a gift, a nice dinner out, the center of the watermelon, all those things. my mom buys a lot of shit, but when it comes to gifts, she never asks for anything. never did, and probably never will. she said just having me come over was a gift in itself. my mum and i had our moments, but its good to see shit just naturally worked out. i dont say this enough, but i love my mum. and my pop. and my grumma. and yes, even my sister. so to this special occasion, i say happy mothers day mom and grumma i jus wanted to say i love you both. and i pray to God that you never, ever read my blogs.
i’ve been longboarding at pretty much every occasion. i even left drinking with julia and mel on thursday to longboard in the parking lots of annandale. yesterday after we ate, tommy and i even did a little parking lot pimpin. tommy opened the doors, blazed some kid cudi, and i skated around the parking lot. and i no longer spend most of my longboarding sessions chasing down the board. i got pretty good at riding, so now i just need someone else to ride with. and a cool longboarding gang name. is “ride” the correct verb? or skate? skate sounds so high school.
friday night i drank til 6 am saturday morning. for the past month or so, i’ve been listening to birds chirp before going to bed. what the hell am i doing? on saturday went to k street for hutchs bday. surprisingly, he was pretty tamed. blacked the fuck out, but pretty tamed. i woke him up sunday morning and he looked confused as hell. “how did i get here?” face. SOMEBODY called me boring on saturday night. you can call me nerdy, studdery, but you cannot call me boring. ill show the world whats up.
when i drink a lot saturday night, i’ll wake up early or on time for church on sunday. if i don’t drink a lot, i’ll wake up later than hell. i need to find my balance.
life seems so great on sundays and mondays when you’re not hungover.
k i love you bye
[a friday story]
went to eat with church staff people yesterday. the most awkward group evar. so in times liek that, i just ate. i probably ate like 1.5 lbs of meat (no fuckinhomo), 2 shots of soju, and i think 3 beers. went to meet up julia, continued the drinking with more beer and a little bit of soju McOju.
today i left my lunch at home. but i also brought my longboard.
coworker joe: goin to shoppin center to get lunch. wanna go?
me: yeah, drop me off at the light and ima board to popeyes.
and i did. sat there and peacefully ate. ordered 9pc nuggets, fries, loaded wrap, and large sweet tea. if i was gonna eat something bad, ima make it bad as fuck. since i felt fat as shit, i made the decision to board back, since its not that far.
worst mistake ever.
sweaty and nauseous. went to bathroom. threw up a little.
now im good as new. cept im still sweaty.
never doing that ever again.
great way to start the weekend right?
suck on that valley high.
k i love %n bye
%n = oldschool aim term. if you dont know that, you dont know life.
[glassic top 5 girls]
jrok and i were texting on saturday, so we could figure out something to do. tryin to meet up on that beautiful saturday. we were having a wonderful texting conversation until he asked me “want to smoke?” and i said “nah. but ill do somethin else.” conversation ended instantly. i think this whole time he was just trying to make me some the lazy grass with him.
————————————————————————-
a couple weeks ago, wally and i walked out of amphoras. he also said “sonyas pretty cool.” that sparked the conversation and debate, of the five coolest girls we know. want to see the list? here it is.
5. sonya. i guess its kinda weird to put her as #5, cause we don’t know her too well. but wally insisted. i guess one drunken 30 minute 5 am breakfast at amphoras with her sealed her spot in the top 5.
4. robin. drinks like champ, talks like a man, skinny as tayshaun prince, participates in all the crazy shits we do, and also makes a good packed lunch. steps is on edge lookin in though.
3. hanna choi. best person to go to nrb with, best person to play video games with, best person to have dance off with, best person to play board games with
2. maria. no one knows her cept me wally steve and a bunch of other people we went to europe with, whom will forever be close to my heart. wally called her female larry. she made us laugh like a champ. lives in korea, and forever will be almost coolest.
1. borahmie aka chubs. wally’s partner in crime. knows magic and taught me cool things. i know yall are dissappointed cause most of you guys don’t know her. haters gonna hate. potatoes gonna potate.
no offense to a lot of you girls i know, but it was hard to cut it down to 5. and there you have it.
who are the coolest girls in your opinion?
but a special shoutout to my sister, julia, jiae, juliana, tina, the brains wife. just so you dont get offended now.
k i love you bye
[a step story]
saturday night, we went to donovan’s house for chans bday. donovans house is a bar at a hotel. we all knew that. well, 90% us knew that. its a rooftop bar with a pool. very nice, but pricey as a bitch. we were about a block away until step and deb wanted to go to cvs to munch on something. i said sure lets go. i thought maybe like a slim jim, small bag of chips, something you can eat while walking a block. i see step buying complicated eating material.
me: uh….are you really….?
step: i didn’t eat dinner
me: uhh okay how are you planning to eat that walking
step: ima eat it at your friends house
me: wait….what?
step: ill just eat it real quick at his house
me: whos house?
step: the house we’re going to…..
me: wait. what?? you do know we’re going to a bar right?
step: i thought we were going to donovan’s house?
me: umm yeah..thats the name of the bar.
thus began a whole night of miscommunication and confusion.
steps and i also have an ongoing bet to see whos better at beer pong. if i win, she has to go to church for a month. she reluctantly agreed. ironically, i’m beating her in a drinking game for her to go to church. im not a good ol church boy, but i realized the only way i can get most of my friends to go to church is to either tricking them, or making a bet with them. like with wally, he sleeps over on a saturday, and i say “i’ll drop you off after church.” and then he has the “WTF larry” face. with johnhur, i say “go to church with us or you’re not coming out with us”. thats like when my mom used to ask me in korean…
mom: do you want to eat your vegetables?
me: no.
mom: okay let me ask you again. do you WANT to eat your vegetables?
me: NO i DONT WANT TO.
mom: okay. i dont think you understand me clearly. do you want to eat your vegetables? or do you want to get beat, and then eat your vegetables?
me …ill…just…eat..the…vegetables…
omg. im turning into my mother.
on sunday after church i longboarded for the first time. one of my youth group kids let me use hers and man. that shit is FUN. i don’t even snowboard or skate board so this whole four wheel on piece of wood is new and exciting to me. after work yesterday, i went to another youth group kid’s house and he taught me the ways of the longboard. he let me borrow his, and i went home and had some fun. most of the time was spent chasing down the board. i would jump off cause i was going to fast. im pretty sure the kids outside were laughing at me. but fuck you, i have a car and you dont.
looks relaxing and scary as FUCK at the same time.
k i love you bye
[the gay guy and my auntie]
i had to work for my parents cleaners this past saturday. it would’ve actually been iite, cept that i drank til 4am the night before. pretty dreadful, but i forgot all the interesting stuff that happens. i was just working, and i saw this guy walked in. and the moment i saw him, i remembered what happened the last time i saw him about 3-4 years ago. i was working at my moms store when this old guy, and his son comes in. his son looked about…25-26. but you can never tell with em white folks. anyways, the moment i saw the son, i could tell he was gay. my gaydar isn’t the most accurate, but from his outfit, posture, man-purse, and voice, i couldnt be wrong. im not saying theres anything wrong with that, i was just making an observation. like if a tall black guy walked in, i would think “professional athlete”.anyways, you can totally tell this guy was a gay. so him and his dad came up to the counter. my aunt is close with the guy, and hasn’t seen his son since he was in high school. they hugged, it was cute. i introduced myself, and whatever. my aunt is a fob, very funny, and by far my favorite relative.
gay guys dad: so hows everything with you lucy?
aunt: its good! oh my your son so handsome! i remember he used to be little!
gay guy: haha thank you
aunt: how old are you now?
gay guy: 26
aunt: ooooooh college?
gay guy: no, finished. i live in new york.
aunt: ohhhh handsome guy in new york!
everybody shares a chuckle, i share slightly nervous chuckle cause my aunt doesn’t put 2 and 2 together easily when it comes to white people.
aunt: haha, so…..do you have girlfriend?! HAHAHa
me (slapping my forehead): ooooy.
gay guy turns red, and his dad smiles.
gay guy: haha..um….no….
aunt: WHYY?! YOU ARE SOO HANDSOME
gay guy: hahah uhhhhhh
me (thinking): omg.
aunt: theres so many people in new york and you can’t find girlfriend?!
gay guy: hahahaa i just like hanging out with my friends.
aunt: oh okay, if you want girlfriend i find you one.
gay guy: haha ok thanks.
they talk a lil bit more about non-gay stuff, and they leave. as SOON as they leave, i turn to my aunt
me: umm…you do realize…that…he’s gay right?
aunt: HAHAAH OF COURSE I KNEW!
me: …WHAT?
aunt: just joking with him sheesh!
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so the topic around the world is osama is dead. i could give my view and amateur opinions on the matter but that just aint glassic style. but i will say this. twitter is the #1 news outlet. cause everytime something big happens, i find out through twitter or facebook. so get it julia!
k i love you bye
